I agree with your post Itsjustus, especially the part about having a choice. You have a choice how you want to live your life. Coming on here helped me realize that. We do not have to stay in a bad situation. We can attempt to fix our situation with the person or move on. Of course there are sacrifices, but to live an unhappy life is not an option that I want to take. In fact, I refuse to take it.
I do not find this forum depressing. I feel a need to encourage and help others. I see people in need and remember how I felt when I first came on here. No one can understand the pain of a SM except those who've lived it.
This is the issue I have with people deleting their accounts. Their past input is lost (or can only be found again by accident). - Specifically for Roch, his past content is gone. - Now if his posts of woe, self criticism et al were still there, it would provide an excellent reference point for newbies and others. - His run of stuff was an excellent example of how an ILIASM shithole fucks with your head, gets you thinking weird shit, gets you making uninformed choices that feed back in to the loop. In its' own way, it was super valuable. Just like the anguished posts in the old EP group of "OutOfPatience" and "ManMovingForward", the Roch's of their time. And now it is lost If his stories / comments were still there, you could say to a newbie "look up the writings of Roch if you want a glimpse of where you can be heading" (just like you might suggest to another newbie "look up the writings of GeekGoddess if you want a glimpse of where you could get to") - If *you* are thinking of deleting your account, consider leaving it up. Leave us some sort of legacy. You never know who it might help.
I'm thankful that this forum doesn't have a nuclear option like EP did - you can't delete your entire existence (at least, last time I considered it). It seems that everything gets unhooked, but the content is still there. And those conversations are still valuable and important to many other people, some of whom haven't even joined yet.
But yeah, abandoning the account is still a better thing than deleting. You never know if you might need to come back, and that continuity and history (especially in PM) might be really helpful.
Post by Chatter Fox on Nov 22, 2016 20:59:57 GMT -5
I'm sad to see you go. We've chatted a bit privately and we certainly have some things in common. I truly wish you the best. I really like you. You are a wonderful person with many of the same struggles I have dealt with. I just wish you happiness, plain and simple. You deserve it so much. You are a rare breed. We need more of you in this world. I know your struggle more than you may realize. I understand your need to distance yourself from iliasm though. I come and go for the very reasons you stated. If you do decide to come back, I will be more than happy to help you out in any way I can. Wishing you the best.