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Post by Deleted on May 23, 2016 13:03:46 GMT -5
Is there an easy way to make a poll on this site, I know I asked before but maybe this is a topic well suited for one?
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Post by Deleted on May 23, 2016 14:04:54 GMT -5
Definitely pro-limitation. Especially for us lady folk. You gentlemen are on your own!  But personally, I don't want to receive any inappopriate PMs. It would scare me and I would leave. |
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Post by Dan on May 23, 2016 14:54:40 GMT -5
It is more that such a limitation feels unfriendly and the forum would feel like a closed group. I think this sort of "restriction" is common in "these sort of forums". In other words, nothing is perfect, but at least it is something, and prevents "drive-by perving". And because it is common, we don't look like we are "being exclusive". Having (say) 20 posts "out there" is low enough that a shy person could meet. And a scungeball would should his colors if 20 of his 20 posts were "Yep!" and "I agree!" before he started sending dick pix. I think the questions boils down to this: since (IMO) drive-by-perving has NOT been the dominate "stranger danger" issue here (yet), then is it worth it to implement this, for the theoretical worry that an extremely shy person WOULD HAVE reach out to a kindred soul via PM before reaching 20 posts. In other words, I guess I'm concluding: this is at best a smallish problem; either doing nothing or trying the fix has smallish downsides. Let's not sweat it too much. I'm leaning "try it; set the limit to 20". We can easily UNDO it if we get the sense that |
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Post by sand5280 on May 23, 2016 16:06:38 GMT -5
Unless I missed it, I have not seen one item I'm sure everyone must have considered when they came here in the first place. You are in a forum dealing with all kinds of people discussing sex. You don't know any of them. By coming here you are placing yourself in a vulnerable situation. You have put your words out to the entire world. Unfortunately, it is a magnet for undesirables seemingly impossible to prevent. It may sound overly blunt, but be prepared when you sign up. Again unfortunately, you put up a notice like this and you will scare away newcomers. But not necessary, as anyone coming in will be as wary as we all were the first day we did.
I missed the recent happenings, but apparently it was shut down quickly by Admin, after being reported. Also I saw long ago, this site is fantastic in the way members look out for each other.
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Post by Deleted on May 23, 2016 17:28:14 GMT -5
20 posts seems entirely reasonable to me, as Dan said. I amend my vote to a minimum of 20 posts. |
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Post by unmatched on May 23, 2016 17:32:02 GMT -5
Only gotcha might be a timid lurker who feels comfortable contacting someone on PM to discuss their issue, but not publicly. They might never hit the minimum post count. I think this might be quite a big issue for some people who are not comfortable 'coming out' in public but would really benefit from some more private support. So personally I would vote not to set a minimum unless the trolls start to become a real problem. But then I am vaginally disadvantaged and not one of the people who is going to be trolled, so I think men's votes should probably only count half on this one. |
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Post by Deleted on May 23, 2016 17:36:24 GMT -5
Unless I missed it, I have not seen one item I'm sure everyone must have considered when they came here in the first place. You are in a forum dealing with all kinds of people discussing sex. You don't know any of them. By coming here you are placing yourself in a vulnerable situation. You have put your words out to the entire world. Unfortunately, it is a magnet for undesirables seemingly impossible to prevent. It may sound overly blunt, but be prepared when you sign up. Again unfortunately, you put up a notice like this and you will scare away newcomers. But not necessary, as anyone coming in will be as wary as we all were the first day we did. I missed the recent happenings, but apparently it was shut down quickly by Admin, after being reported. Also I saw long ago, this site is fantastic in the way members look out for each other. Yeah, NO. It's THIS type of "deal with it" mansplaining that makes me want a little limitation on contacting others (namely women) privately. You're absolutely right, sand5280. You don't know what happened, because it was handled quickly and without fanfare. But, rest assured that had it not been, I would have quietly deleted my account, as I have done on other sites - simply because my participation was deemed not as "important" as a man's was. (Yeah, I'm pissed off) |
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Post by sand5280 on May 23, 2016 18:08:09 GMT -5
@zumbamami And any others offended: As I said, I knew I must have missed something. And also my post was scratched together in haste. Both of these could have been avoided if I spent more of my time here. I have re-read it a few times, it doesn't look right.
My apologies for any misunderstanding, My intention was not to say 'deal with it' I must have chosen the wrong words, or phrased it incorrectly. And of course your participation is important.
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Post by Deleted on May 23, 2016 19:16:28 GMT -5
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Post by wewbwb on May 24, 2016 15:54:00 GMT -5
z now put down the knife.
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Post by greatcoastal on May 24, 2016 16:00:28 GMT -5
z now put down the knife. Better watch my phrases. No more, " I'll take a stab at that" or " mind if I poke around". |
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Post by wewbwb on May 25, 2016 15:26:03 GMT -5
Post count, although looks like a convenient way to weed out the bad ones, seems to be an arbitrary measure. You only mention the quantity of posts, not their quality in terms of efforts needed to put up a thoughtful response. A one word response, counts as a post. And posting quickly to the one word association threads (that seem to be proliferating here lately, perhaps as annoying as unsolicited PMs as they clearly flood the latest posts feeds....) those with bad intentions can easily overcome the 20, 50 or even 100 posts that's the threshold for full membership. I'm afraid this point is moot. Let us try to be reasonable in that you can't control everything, there will always be trolls and pervs online and in real life. When members (women and perhaps more rarely men), feel harassed by irresponsible members, they can report those profiles and moderators and admin may delete profile of perpetrators following a well thought out and clearly communicated protocol. I'd say, there's nothing particularly disturbing in this forum so far. Let's not over complicate things. I am a perv Fiery - although I try not to annoy anyone - I can never make that promise - so if I do - please just tell me to stop. |
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Post by Deleted on May 25, 2016 17:27:47 GMT -5
Fiery - Wow. I thought folks actually liked the word association games. Point taken.
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Post by dancingbear70 on May 25, 2016 17:57:30 GMT -5
Add me to the anti-limit group. Or maybe a 1 post limit to eliminate a complete fly-by.
I probably didn't post 20 times on EP in over 2 years. But the private conversations were incredibly meaningful and important. I also know many EP ILIASM friends who are registered but not currently actively participating. I would hate to preclude them from PM'ing me or anyone else.
As long as the mods are doing the excellent job that they seem to be, isn't that the best way to handle any trolling issues?
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Post by Deleted on May 25, 2016 18:01:44 GMT -5
Fiery - Wow. I thought folks actually liked the word association games. Point taken. I like the word association games. I'm easily amused, ha ha! |
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But personally, I don't want to receive any inappopriate PMs. It would scare me and I would leave.
