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Post by baza on Jul 31, 2016 20:21:26 GMT -5
Quoting bbgirl here - "Maybe we should ask: why do some leave? What is different?" - I think that of the spouses who leave their ILIASM shithole, they have one thing in common. They have the appropriate legal advice as to how such a scenario would shake out for them, and they have an exit strategy - be it rudimentary or highly sophisticated - that they are prepared to enact. In other words, they have a plan, an alternative, a viable option to continuing on in the ILIASM shithole environment. - On the other hand, those that stay (most), do NOT have legal advice / do-able exit strategies. They do NOT have an alternate plan. Or, they have these things but are not prepared to enact them. - I guess that then takes us back a stage to pose the question "what will motivate a person to seek legal advice and construct an exit strategy ?" - That will vary from person to person, but there will be a mix of two motivating factors. #1 - being the dread of pissing the rest of ones life up against the wall. The fear motivation. #2 - being the recognition that a brighter future beckons, with all it's possibilities. The hope motivation. - There will be various mixes of #1 and #2 in play, but I think personally that #1 is usually the big gun. At least initially. That's the one that is most likely to get an ILIASM shithole spouse into movement. #2 seems to emerge later in the process (and often drags its' heels) but once in place it is also a very powerful motivator. - I have managed to get way off the original topic here, so I'll post this as a new thread as well.
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