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Post by WindSister on Mar 20, 2017 16:11:02 GMT -5
No, really -- your biggest fear?
I am not talking spiders and snakes, I am talking fear that drives your behavior. Do you know? Or do you just act from it unknowingly?
Can you identify it?
Expose it?
Shine the light on it?
We all have fears, they don't make us weak or flawed.
We have to know them in order to grow from them.
Just throwing this out there.
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Post by hopingforachange on Mar 20, 2017 19:23:48 GMT -5
Loosing the ability to get him up and ejaculate. The drugs side affects freaked the shit out of me. I have never been so worried in my life.
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Post by wewbwb on Mar 20, 2017 20:22:56 GMT -5
Failure.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 20, 2017 21:30:15 GMT -5
Getting very old, having health problems, and outliving my money - ALONE.
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Post by GeekGoddess on Mar 21, 2017 7:50:21 GMT -5
I'm MOST afraid of not being me. Living for (to please) someone else.
Now that I've been out a while (and after the Loverman saga), I no longer fear being alone. But I don't want to give myself away to have someone else (a partner) in my life. It isn't worth that, and I'm a default people-pleaser (have made progress but there is more progress to be made).
I fear rejection if I am acting from my true self. In the past year or two, though, I have taken big risks to put my real self out there in the world - and miracle of miracles, it is received with appreciation. I have made a big network of friends - people I really enjoy being around. And I usually go home alone - and that's okay.
I just want to do and be who my heart feels is right. A smart, funny, flawed, (slightly sex-crazed) woman. If I have to hide my inner self to be with someone, I would rather be alone.
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Post by tamara68 on Mar 21, 2017 9:54:50 GMT -5
Before I left, the biggest fear was getting old with him still living with me.
Now my biggest fear is that my daughter won't be able to become independent from her dad.
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Post by bballgirl on Mar 21, 2017 10:17:00 GMT -5
It took me awhile to figure out what I fear.
It's not death and I've faced death. Not money, I've just never cared about money, probably why I'm a teacher. Not being alone- I have family and friends. Not falling in love- I did once, madly! And look where it got me.
So my fear is - Not living and experiencing life.
In my marriage I felt very controlled.
Every weekend we had to be at the baseball field and if I didn't go I was given grief about it. Now I have 2 weekends a month that I don't have to go and once a month I try to get my son a weekend off.
There are places I would like to visit and travel to.
Last year I divorced in 2016 and I had a very happy year.
I didn't travel but this year I will in the Summer taking the kids on vacation.
So my fear is not living an authentic life and experiencing people and places.
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Post by Rhapsodee on Mar 27, 2017 1:03:15 GMT -5
Doing the same stupid thing again and not realizing until its too late.
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Post by allworkandnoplay on Mar 27, 2017 20:32:30 GMT -5
I'm not afraid of being alone, I have enough of that already, but I am afraid of being lonely. I am afraid that if I do finally get the courage to get out that I won't be able to find someone. I've never been good at making friends and, if I am honest, I have let myself go over the years - I am not the striking lad I was in my youth  I know this probably seems vain, or even shallow, (maybe even a little co-dependent) but it is a fear. |
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Post by mrslowmaintenance on Mar 27, 2017 20:59:40 GMT -5
Encountering any of the men who harmed me as a child.
Becoming my mother.
My child dying.
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jpn
Junior Member
Brrrrrrrrr...
Posts: 75 
Age Range: 46-50
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Post by jpn on Mar 27, 2017 21:07:58 GMT -5
Losing my daughter.
Making big decisions too late.
Starting over.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 28, 2017 11:52:58 GMT -5
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Post by novembercomingfire on Apr 20, 2017 10:40:13 GMT -5
That my children will live the same empty life that i have.
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Post by WindSister on Apr 24, 2017 9:15:21 GMT -5
I asked the question and now I can't answer it. That's weird.
I used to live so fearfully - anxious - jittery.
I guess as I get older a little of that settles.
Death is a big fear of mine - not mine so much but others. Watching people die sucks.
Losing my husband to death is a huge fear.
Losing my mom to death also is even though she drives me certifiably crazy sometimes.
I know it's inevitable at some point, though, so I really do try to live without regret.
Love and appreciate what you have NOW.
Live fully NOW.
Appreciate and love those you love without reserve NOW.
It all goes away someday.
Speaking of that - being forgotten in a nursing home with burnt out staff treating me like their obligation to a pay check also is a fear. I'd rather die too young than forgotten in a sad old room for decades.
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Post by GeekGoddess on Apr 24, 2017 11:38:46 GMT -5
 The Loverman sent me this yesterday. Hm. Even though I don't really know what to make of that (him sending it to me), I love Paulo Coelho & WindSister's above post made me want to share it. |
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I know this probably seems vain, or even shallow, (maybe even a little co-dependent) but it is a fear. 
