Post by WindSister on Mar 6, 2018 13:32:54 GMT -5
marthabeck.com/2016/09/be-honest/
I am diving a bit deeper into mindfulness, meditation by taking a 21 day course by Deepak soon. (It's free, why not). The course doesn't start until the 19th, so I have just been perusing Deepak's site and landed on this article. LOVE IT!!! Must share.
This was good timing for me after having "opted out" of helping step daughter move with all the other parents. I feel quite "clean" with that decision.
I particularly liked the closing paragraph in this article:
I am diving a bit deeper into mindfulness, meditation by taking a 21 day course by Deepak soon. (It's free, why not). The course doesn't start until the 19th, so I have just been perusing Deepak's site and landed on this article. LOVE IT!!! Must share.
...As a result, impurely motivated actions tend to backfire. Lie for approval, and people disapprove. Try to control people, and you lose control. Pretend to be perfect, and you risk being caught by folks who’ll abhor your pretense of perfection more than your imperfections themselves.
If, in light of all this, you’re hesitant to do the Agenda Cleanse, I’ll assume it’s because you’re either Lady Macbeth or Mother Teresa. Everyone else, please meet me at the next paragraph.
Agenda Cleanse Step 1: Pick an interaction, any interaction.
Think of something you plan to do in the upcoming hours or days that involves other people. It could be going to a coworker’s birthday party, putting in a day at the office, attending square-dancing class, whatever. We’ll call this interaction activity X.
Step 2: Ask yourself the actor’s question.
Keeping activity X in mind, ask yourself, What’s my motivation for doing this? Don’t spit out the first facile answer that comes to mind (Um, I have to?). Give it real thought, and be brutally honest. Your clarity—maybe a little piece of your sanity—depends on it.
There might be several reasons you’re planning to undertake activity X. Feel for the one that’s deepest. Maybe you’ll be attending the coworker’s birthday party because you sort of want to be there but also to be polite, and mainly because you want cake. You may go to work to earn money, and to feel important, but primarily to prove your worth to your parents. Perhaps you square-dance partly for love of the music, partly to show off your new Frye boots, but mostly because your friends just keep hounding you until you go. Pick the motivation that feels most true, your real bedrock reason.
Step 3: See if your real agenda aligns with your apparent agenda.
Step 4: Clean your hidden agendas with an unbroken stream of truth.
Step 5: Allow your pure inner agenda to radiate outward.
Step 6: Fill your life with clean, clear things.
If, in light of all this, you’re hesitant to do the Agenda Cleanse, I’ll assume it’s because you’re either Lady Macbeth or Mother Teresa. Everyone else, please meet me at the next paragraph.
Agenda Cleanse Step 1: Pick an interaction, any interaction.
Think of something you plan to do in the upcoming hours or days that involves other people. It could be going to a coworker’s birthday party, putting in a day at the office, attending square-dancing class, whatever. We’ll call this interaction activity X.
Step 2: Ask yourself the actor’s question.
Keeping activity X in mind, ask yourself, What’s my motivation for doing this? Don’t spit out the first facile answer that comes to mind (Um, I have to?). Give it real thought, and be brutally honest. Your clarity—maybe a little piece of your sanity—depends on it.
There might be several reasons you’re planning to undertake activity X. Feel for the one that’s deepest. Maybe you’ll be attending the coworker’s birthday party because you sort of want to be there but also to be polite, and mainly because you want cake. You may go to work to earn money, and to feel important, but primarily to prove your worth to your parents. Perhaps you square-dance partly for love of the music, partly to show off your new Frye boots, but mostly because your friends just keep hounding you until you go. Pick the motivation that feels most true, your real bedrock reason.
Step 3: See if your real agenda aligns with your apparent agenda.
Step 4: Clean your hidden agendas with an unbroken stream of truth.
Step 5: Allow your pure inner agenda to radiate outward.
Step 6: Fill your life with clean, clear things.
This was good timing for me after having "opted out" of helping step daughter move with all the other parents. I feel quite "clean" with that decision.
I particularly liked the closing paragraph in this article:
I’ve noticed that as my clients begin speaking the truth to themselves more often, they grow increasingly accurate at spotting false agendas in others. This makes them safer in every situation.
Run frequent agenda cleanses, and you’ll unconsciously steer yourself toward activities you truly love and people who truly love you. People will trust you, and you’ll know whom to trust. The brain space that was tied up in conniving manipulation will be free for problem solving and creativity. Your energy will rise; your stress level will fall. You’ll be happier and more at peace.
Macbeth tries to make this happen for his wife. He orders a doctor to “Cleanse….that perilous stuff which weighs upon the heart.” The doctor, checking his records and noticing that psychiatry won’t be invented for centuries, says, “Therein the patient must minister to himself.” Agenda cleansing, you see, is an inside job. And I have nothing up my sleeve when I say I think you’re just the person to do it.
Run frequent agenda cleanses, and you’ll unconsciously steer yourself toward activities you truly love and people who truly love you. People will trust you, and you’ll know whom to trust. The brain space that was tied up in conniving manipulation will be free for problem solving and creativity. Your energy will rise; your stress level will fall. You’ll be happier and more at peace.
Macbeth tries to make this happen for his wife. He orders a doctor to “Cleanse….that perilous stuff which weighs upon the heart.” The doctor, checking his records and noticing that psychiatry won’t be invented for centuries, says, “Therein the patient must minister to himself.” Agenda cleansing, you see, is an inside job. And I have nothing up my sleeve when I say I think you’re just the person to do it.
