New Job. Maybe not travel so much (80%) I am tired of being on the road while my house implodes. I was traveling last week with my wife at home with the flu and my kid had to stay home from school for a day to take care of her..... sucks. I know however I have to travel or I will go crazy as well....
Where do you see yourself at the end of this year?
I hope to have more of my debts paid down. My income takes a dip in the summer so I normally pay bills ahead where I can to minimize the hit in July and August. My goal is to have as many small debts as possible paid off by June to minimize the number of bills overall. Then I will have more of my income to whittle away at the larger debts this Fall. Improving my debt to income ratio is part of my long term goal towards getting out and not going bankrupt from it.
Bits of me are dying but others are growing. One step at a time.
I know it’s been a while. Here’s a question for today: What is one positive thing that you’ve experienced as a result of the shelter-in-place/social distancing guidelines?
I know it’s probably hard to find a silver lining in this mess. It certainly has been for me. But this morning, as I was drinking my tea and contemplating the day ahead of me, I realized that this was the very first time in a very long time that I allowed myself to take the time to just do nothing. Since my split, I’d followed all of the advice. I filled my days with work, the gym, getting out there to meet people, reaching out to the people I loved, being as social as possible. I kept myself so busy trying to silence the noise of the anxieties that plagued me so much. I lost track of the fact that this introvert really needs time to get lost in a good sappy book and allow herself to be lazy for a full day. Would I have allowed myself this luxury had it not been forced on me? Likely not- so there’s my positive. The stresses, anxieties, and worries that plague me these days will still be there but I’m going to take a break today and lose myself in a world where life is good and endings are happy. Stay safe, stay home, and do what makes you happy.
Post by worksforme2 on Apr 11, 2020 12:13:13 GMT -5
Actually a couple things....I have thrown myself into catching up on the maintenance on my home and yard, stuff I ignored for far too long. Now the place is looking pretty spiffy again Even one of my neighbors commented on how good the place is looking. And I am not done yet. Also I spent a half day thinning out my long neglected strawberry beds. I had 4 large flats of plants that I have distributed around the neighborhood. So if I croak my strawberries will live on. I have however been a constant violator of the "shelter in place directive" for NC. My Harley doesn't understand pandemics so I have been compelled to ride it. And to be honest, I am not sorry. So my apologies to all those who follow the rules about staying home, I just gotta go 2 wheeling.
Great to see QOTD back, and an excellent question sadkat . Despite the horrible rationale for the social distancing I can see several silver linings. Most obviously I do not miss my dreadful commute to work through crappy traffic which just in itself gives me 1 1/2 to 2 hours per day, more sleep and less stress. I cook more and have been able to get out and walk in some unusual early spring sunshine. Like worksforme2 I have spruced up my large garden during downtime when “working from home” 😉 My children are off school so we have been hanging together in the house and garden, watching movies and cooking. They have each had state exams cancelled so we have all been spared the anxieties of GCSE & A levels. Like sadkat I have also used the time to simply ask less of myself in terms of rushing around and being superwoman. But best of all, as most people are at home at the same time I have been able to spend long periods of time to remotely connect with a special person to me which has brought me much happiness.
I never thought I’d say this, but I miss sitting in Nashville traffic. At least I could sing Merle Haggard as loud as I want and bother no one.
As for the QOTD: before the Corona hangover, the STBX took over the kitchen and became the chef [food heater upper] every evening, excluding me from the dinner table. Meanwhile I was feeling more and more socially-isolated from my 2 daughters, even before COVID-19 hit the US.
Only last week did it get through my thick skull that the fact that the girls were skipping breakfast and lunch/eating junk while mom works away in the living room presented an opportunity.
Enter Dad, the AM chef. Before quarantine, they always wanted hash browns from Burger King. This morning? Two large russet potatoes, shredded in a box grater, 1 egg, salt, fried in oil, w/o stirring, until golden, in a serving-sized mini skillet, 2-1/2 minutes, flip, drain on paper towel (if you can find any), more salt. Feeds (3). 😁
They say the way to a girl’s heart is through her stomach. I believe this may be Dad’s salvation...
Post by solodriver on Apr 11, 2020 23:15:10 GMT -5
One thing has become quite clear: None of us know how much time we have left. It makes you change the way you look at things. I guess that's a silver lining.
This has made me look back and really appreciate the intimate relationships I did have, and though sad they didn't last, I'm grateful for each one I had. They were all beautiful and wonderful in their own individual ways.
I hope I have a few more to come in my life.
It’s hard to continue to love someone romantically who doesn’t love you back in the way you need to feel like a whole person.
Post by ScottDinTN on Apr 12, 2020 19:54:04 GMT -5
I've had the threat of layoff hanging over my head for about a year and a half at my company. About a week ago I was finally laid off. It was kind of a feeling of relief. No more cloud hanging over my head. This is probably the best time to get laid off with all of the extra benefits right now. Decided I want to start my own business so thought I use this time to get it going. Can't go full steam yet with a lot of things closed and not going out much. Hopefully in a few weeks that will change. Hopefully, a year from now I can look back and say this was the second best thing that could have happened to me. The best would be finding someone new to love but that will be in the future. :-)
This social distancing and being stuck at home sucks. I hate it. I'm stuck working from home and never get away from my W. Nothing good has come from this. I miss going to work just to have a few hours away from W. I miss driving to work and the sweet solitude of my car. I'm tired of this and about ready to go find a Rona patient to cough on me just so I can go to a hospital and get away from her.
I have quit all romantic pretense and have stopped acknowledging her emotional state. There is a noticable uneasiness in the house that isn't spoken of. We still do all the routine things around the house. We've done a few home repairs and some yard work. I think that the depth of my indifference towards her is sinking in for her. I'm done bending over backwards to meet her emotional needs if she's going to neglect my needs. She's made several comments about me not talking to her and spending all my free time online. I just shrug and don't respond. The last two days, she's been really quiet and left me alone (thank God) and I think she may be realizing that this is her new normal.
The last time we argued about sex sometime last year, I told her that I was done chasing after a woman who doesn't want me. Her response was "Maybe if you ........ then I might want you more." This proves to me right through her own words and phrasing that: 1- She doesn't want me. and 2- Even if I did everything she wants me to, the best I can hope for is a maybe. Until now, I don't think she believed me.
... Her response was "Maybe if you ........ then I might want you more." This proves to me right through her own words and phrasing that: 1- She doesn't want me. and 2- Even if I did everything she wants me to, the best I can hope for is a maybe. Until now, I don't think she believed me.
This the "Shoutbox" -- basically a site-wide, group chat. (It's only visible to members.)
worksforme2: Happy Birthday greatcoastal,.....
Oct 14, 2022 8:05:03 GMT -5
worksforme2: I'm reading about flash flooding in south east Australia. I think that might be near you Baz. Are you located on high ground?
Oct 14, 2022 10:16:46 GMT -5
greatcoastal: Thanks for the B.D. wishes! Dinner with a friend tonight and B.D. dance with the Ladies tomorrow!
Oct 14, 2022 16:38:40 GMT -5
petrushka: Hope you haven't had to resort to snorkles yet, Baza. I just saw a figure of 12m for some place. Yeesh. And according to the flood warning map you're in the red zone...
Oct 15, 2022 6:09:38 GMT -5
worksforme2: Happy Birthday misssunnybunny.....
Oct 23, 2022 5:06:17 GMT -5
wewbwb: The best of birthday wishes to misssunnybunny , a special woman who deserves the best!
Oct 23, 2022 9:56:58 GMT -5
petrushka: Ditto, many happy returns!
Oct 24, 2022 1:27:01 GMT -5
jim44444: Was that a shootout from the long absent wewbwb?
Oct 24, 2022 17:38:53 GMT -5
misssunnybunny: Thank you for the birthday wishes! It was a very happy birthday!
Oct 25, 2022 10:05:56 GMT -5
wewbwb: Yes jim44444 I only appear on misssunnybunny birthday. But that doesn't mean I don't watch what you hooligans are up to.
Oct 25, 2022 19:03:38 GMT -5
mirrororchid: What if we say your name three times?
Oct 26, 2022 19:15:10 GMT -5