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Post by mirrororchid on Nov 30, 2022 21:03:54 GMT -5
I've been close to where you are for three years now. It gets better the longer it lasts. You compared once every 10 days (3x per month) and once every 12 days (5x in two months). I was watching the calendar carefully, watching for frequency to slide from 3x every two months (quadruple our sexless experience), but as time went by and that 20ish day interval was reliable, this relatively scarce sex life was okay. A lot had to do with Mrs. MirrorOrchid's attitude. She engages and is invested in the moment. The sex is not very frequent, but it's good when it happens. She's there for me. Its what so many of us (most of us?) are after. Recovery of sexless marriage is a gradual healing of trust and serenity. A restoration of the secure love you thought you were getting when you said "I do." Hopefully, Mrs. Blunder8 is interested in establishing a similar relationship with you that you will find similarly fulfilling. Eventually, the calendar stops beckoning your hawk eyes and you can just be in your marriage. The actions you describe are a lot of trouble for someone who isn't looking to give it earnest effort. It's more than the casual promises we've seen other refusers make. I'm rooting for her, and you.
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Post by blunder8 on Nov 30, 2022 22:52:13 GMT -5
I've been close to where you are for three years now. It gets better the longer it lasts. You compared once every 10 days (3x per month) and once every 12 days (5x in two months). I was watching the calendar carefully, watching for frequency to slide from 3x every two months (quadruple our sexless experience), but as time went by and that 20ish day interval was reliable, this relatively scarce sex life was okay. A lot had to do with Mrs. MirrorOrchid's attitude. She engages and is invested in the moment. The sex is not very frequent, but it's good when it happens. She's there for me. Its what so many of us (most of us?) are after. Recovery of sexless marriage is a gradual healing of trust and serenity. A restoration of the secure love you thought you were getting when you said "I do." Hopefully, Mrs. Blunder8 is interested in establishing a similar relationship with you that you will find similarly fulfilling. Eventually, the calendar stops beckoning your hawk eyes and you can just be in your marriage. The actions you describe are a lot of trouble for someone who isn't looking to give it earnest effort. It's more than the casual promises we've seen other refusers make. I'm rooting for her, and you. Thanks for your comments and well wishes. Much appreciated. It is indeed a long and likely steep road ahead. I still have hope, which as has been noted on this forum, can be a poison you continue to consume without knowing it is preventing you from healing. I want to be connected to her in every way. But I'm also cautious. This may be another in a series of resets and more heartbreak. I know this. I realize I'm trying to swim against the tide, attempting to buck the odds. It's very possible, or even somewhat likely, that in a short time I'll be sitting around the digital bar table on ILIASM.org laughing at myself for being such a damn fool, pounding another beer, and pondering my next move. I do feel myself growing in confidence, a choice I've made to not let this void define me. I'll continue to work on myself. We'll see where the road leads. As you so eloquently stated, it would be amazing to never look at a calendar and count the days or weeks. To have that trust that it's there, it's genuine, and it will mystically revisit the bedroom soon would be . . . beyond words. Between the extremes is maybe where I land. Not back in the intimacy desert, not in the state of blissful calendar unawareness. Perhaps looking at the circle on the calendar from 21 days ago, having a reminder talk with her, initiating and getting a responsive desire romp that is genuine, enthusiastic, and bonding.....yeah, I could live with that too. But I'm pushing for that carve-out where I can "just be in" the marriage.
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onlyhuman
Junior Member

Learning to be all right with what I want.
Posts: 29
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Post by onlyhuman on Dec 28, 2022 9:38:23 GMT -5
medium.com/@drpsychmom/what-would-your-husband-act-like-if-he-got-all-the-physical-affection-he-wanted-ecb1710edc3dWhat Would Your Husband Act Like If He Got All The Physical Affection He Wanted? The majority of men have a love language of physical touch, which includes (but is not limited to) sex. They feel frustrated, sad, and lonely in their marriages when their wives do not give them this love language, for a surfeit of reasons I cover ceaselessly in this blog like here, here, and here. Even when men in this situation do get to have sex with (or generally touch) their wives, it is never as much as they would actually want. What if you decided to see how it would impact your husband to give him all the love he actually wants and needs in the way that he feels loved? I work with many women who receive daily or near-daily compliments, massages, acts of service, and so forth from their husbands, because their husbands are trying to speak their love languages and make them happy. Yet, these women often dole out sex on a schedule that makes the ratio about 10:1 minimum in favor of times per week that their husband engages in their love language versus when they engage in his. This makes the men bitter and resentful, and eventually they stop doing the things their wives like, which meets with a sharp outcry. Many women can say with a straight face that a man should do nice things just because he loves her, without thinking he deserves to get laid, but also say that she doesn’t want to have sex and shouldn’t have to do it if she never wants to. This is illogical, because sex is what the husband considers a “nice thing,” so by the same logic, shouldn’t she do it out of love for him just as he should do whatever her love language is? A way that some women get around this uncomfortable hypocrisy is saying that everything the husband does in her love language of acts of service is “for the household/kids” but sex is “only for him.” Your husband cleaning the counters in the way you like is for you, not for the household, although I of course believe that he should try and deeply empathize with why you care about the counters. But if you want to use that logic, keeping your husband feeling secure and loved via touch and physical affection is for the household and kids as much as for your husband. The kids directly benefit from seeing a loving marriage, two happy parents, and an affectionate adult relationship that can provide them with a template for their own later relationships as adults. A note on housework: Many men do split the housework, and increasingly more in this current era actually do more of it than their wives, from what I see in my practice (versus inaccurate memes online about men being lazy). A frequent unspoken agreement that I see in many couples younger than 40 or so is that the man and woman split basic child care, e.g. bathtime, bedtime, drop-offs, but the woman does extra child enrichment (e.g. piano practice supervision) and/or “emotional labor” (e.g. ordering stuff on her phone that the kids need) while the husband does more of the physical housework, although often at her behest. But if you want to see your husband actively try to please you and go out of his way to knock out the housework and other obligations that wear on you, try to show him love in the way that he most appreciates and values, and see what happens. In situation where the wives DO actually do most of the physical housework, they often say they are too tired for sex because of all the housework they have to do. This is true; I discuss how housework is the death of female libido here. But what if you could kill two birds with one stone: make your husband happy AND get out of doing the housework you dislike? I have not yet encountered a man who yearns for more touch and sex that would not either personally do all the housework his wife dislikes or hire someone to do it IF this would make her want to love him and touch him more (love = touch for people with this love language). Many women are using housework and childcare as an excuse for why they don’t want sex, when, in reality, they just don’t know or don’t want to know that women’s sex drive biologically decreases within monogamy and this isn’t generally because of anything their husband is doing “wrong.” But if you are actually doing too much and are exhausted because of it, try speaking your husband’s love language and see how much of your load he offers to take over. This doesn’t just go for housework. The vast majority of men with higher libidos than their wives (I would say from my counseling experience this is about 75% of men) would try harder in every single arena if they were getting their physical needs and wants addressed in a loving way (not phoning it in). This means more romantic gestures, more date night plans, more compliments, more text messages, whatever. Happy people who feel valued and respected want to do nice things for the partner who makes them feel this way. This is very basic, but is forgotten by most tired, disconnected, stressed people, especially in competitive marriages. If you don’t believe me on this, ask your husband directly how differently he might act if he were having AS MUCH GOOD SEX as he wants (not some “compromise” between “what he wants” and “when I ovulate”). The majority of men do not act “nicer” after having sex because the sum total of their married sex lives is still far below what their needs are. Then women conclude that sex and physical touch in general don’t even impact their husbands, despite all their yammering about sex, and they are just never satisfied. This would be like concluding that amoxicillin doesn’t cure your child’s ear infection if you only give them half the dose that is prescribed by the doctor. Remember, I am talking about a world in which you genuinely want to make your husband happy and see what his actual “best self” could look like if he were totally happy. I am not talking about throwing a bone of one episode of lukewarm sex and then being mad when this doesn’t lead to deep and transformational desire to give you a happier and easier life. It is hard (and brave) to be the first partner to change an entrenched dynamic and to put yourself out there despite the list of grievances you may have amassed over your marriage. But if you can try to genuinely make your husband happy in the ways that he actually deeply wants, I can tell you that I have seen in my couples counseling practice that this can be transformative for men’s self-esteem and happiness, which translates into them being more present, loving, appreciative, proactive, and generous partners. Try it out and see! And till we meet again, I remain, The Blogapist Who Says, Send This Post To Your Partner To Spark A Discussion, Especially If You’re A Woman Who Has Thought “Having Sex Doesn’t Actually Seem To Make Him Nicer Even Though He Gripes So Much About How Little We Have It.” Texted the link to my wife. She replied by asking "Do you feel better for sending this to me?" I replied,"I'd feel better if I felt physically desired by you instead of feeling compelled to send such an article"
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Post by jim44444 on Dec 31, 2022 8:27:54 GMT -5
Texted the link to my wife. She replied by asking "Do you feel better for sending this to me?" I replied,"I'd feel better if I felt physically desired by you instead of feeling compelled to send such an article" So did a discussion ensue?
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Post by deadzone75 on Dec 31, 2022 10:30:38 GMT -5
medium.com/@drpsychmom/what-would-your-husband-act-like-if-he-got-all-the-physical-affection-he-wanted-ecb1710edc3dWhat Would Your Husband Act Like If He Got All The Physical Affection He Wanted? The majority of men have a love language of physical touch, which includes (but is not limited to) sex. They feel frustrated, sad, and lonely in their marriages when their wives do not give them this love language, for a surfeit of reasons I cover ceaselessly in this blog like here, here, and here. Even when men in this situation do get to have sex with (or generally touch) their wives, it is never as much as they would actually want. What if you decided to see how it would impact your husband to give him all the love he actually wants and needs in the way that he feels loved? I work with many women who receive daily or near-daily compliments, massages, acts of service, and so forth from their husbands, because their husbands are trying to speak their love languages and make them happy. Yet, these women often dole out sex on a schedule that makes the ratio about 10:1 minimum in favor of times per week that their husband engages in their love language versus when they engage in his. This makes the men bitter and resentful, and eventually they stop doing the things their wives like, which meets with a sharp outcry. Many women can say with a straight face that a man should do nice things just because he loves her, without thinking he deserves to get laid, but also say that she doesn’t want to have sex and shouldn’t have to do it if she never wants to. This is illogical, because sex is what the husband considers a “nice thing,” so by the same logic, shouldn’t she do it out of love for him just as he should do whatever her love language is? A way that some women get around this uncomfortable hypocrisy is saying that everything the husband does in her love language of acts of service is “for the household/kids” but sex is “only for him.” Your husband cleaning the counters in the way you like is for you, not for the household, although I of course believe that he should try and deeply empathize with why you care about the counters. But if you want to use that logic, keeping your husband feeling secure and loved via touch and physical affection is for the household and kids as much as for your husband. The kids directly benefit from seeing a loving marriage, two happy parents, and an affectionate adult relationship that can provide them with a template for their own later relationships as adults. A note on housework: Many men do split the housework, and increasingly more in this current era actually do more of it than their wives, from what I see in my practice (versus inaccurate memes online about men being lazy). A frequent unspoken agreement that I see in many couples younger than 40 or so is that the man and woman split basic child care, e.g. bathtime, bedtime, drop-offs, but the woman does extra child enrichment (e.g. piano practice supervision) and/or “emotional labor” (e.g. ordering stuff on her phone that the kids need) while the husband does more of the physical housework, although often at her behest. But if you want to see your husband actively try to please you and go out of his way to knock out the housework and other obligations that wear on you, try to show him love in the way that he most appreciates and values, and see what happens. In situation where the wives DO actually do most of the physical housework, they often say they are too tired for sex because of all the housework they have to do. This is true; I discuss how housework is the death of female libido here. But what if you could kill two birds with one stone: make your husband happy AND get out of doing the housework you dislike? I have not yet encountered a man who yearns for more touch and sex that would not either personally do all the housework his wife dislikes or hire someone to do it IF this would make her want to love him and touch him more (love = touch for people with this love language). Many women are using housework and childcare as an excuse for why they don’t want sex, when, in reality, they just don’t know or don’t want to know that women’s sex drive biologically decreases within monogamy and this isn’t generally because of anything their husband is doing “wrong.” But if you are actually doing too much and are exhausted because of it, try speaking your husband’s love language and see how much of your load he offers to take over. This doesn’t just go for housework. The vast majority of men with higher libidos than their wives (I would say from my counseling experience this is about 75% of men) would try harder in every single arena if they were getting their physical needs and wants addressed in a loving way (not phoning it in). This means more romantic gestures, more date night plans, more compliments, more text messages, whatever. Happy people who feel valued and respected want to do nice things for the partner who makes them feel this way. This is very basic, but is forgotten by most tired, disconnected, stressed people, especially in competitive marriages. If you don’t believe me on this, ask your husband directly how differently he might act if he were having AS MUCH GOOD SEX as he wants (not some “compromise” between “what he wants” and “when I ovulate”). The majority of men do not act “nicer” after having sex because the sum total of their married sex lives is still far below what their needs are. Then women conclude that sex and physical touch in general don’t even impact their husbands, despite all their yammering about sex, and they are just never satisfied. This would be like concluding that amoxicillin doesn’t cure your child’s ear infection if you only give them half the dose that is prescribed by the doctor. Remember, I am talking about a world in which you genuinely want to make your husband happy and see what his actual “best self” could look like if he were totally happy. I am not talking about throwing a bone of one episode of lukewarm sex and then being mad when this doesn’t lead to deep and transformational desire to give you a happier and easier life. It is hard (and brave) to be the first partner to change an entrenched dynamic and to put yourself out there despite the list of grievances you may have amassed over your marriage. But if you can try to genuinely make your husband happy in the ways that he actually deeply wants, I can tell you that I have seen in my couples counseling practice that this can be transformative for men’s self-esteem and happiness, which translates into them being more present, loving, appreciative, proactive, and generous partners. Try it out and see! And till we meet again, I remain, The Blogapist Who Says, Send This Post To Your Partner To Spark A Discussion, Especially If You’re A Woman Who Has Thought “Having Sex Doesn’t Actually Seem To Make Him Nicer Even Though He Gripes So Much About How Little We Have It.” Texted the link to my wife. She replied by asking "Do you feel better for sending this to me?" I replied,"I'd feel better if I felt physically desired by you instead of feeling compelled to send such an article" Sounds like your attempt was met with attitude. This is something I learned the hard way every single year when I would gear up for "the talk", where I would plead my case, reaffirm my desire for her, tell her how no sex hurt me, etc. Similarly, I would occasionally send her info, sometimes subtly, other times very bluntly. It never mattered, and only served as an opportunity to once again turn me into the villain. How dare I "attack" her out the blue like that?? (That was actually something she said after one of "The Talks".
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Post by shamwow on Dec 31, 2022 18:39:36 GMT -5
In my post -marriage life, it's a normal thing to meet women who "thought they hated sex" in marriage to their former partner, but who now enjoy and seek out a robust sexual relationship now that their marriage to that person is over. Do you really think that if you divorced, that she would be celibate for the rest of her life? VERY LIKELY SO, YESSome of us - me included - and people in my real life circles - discover that their "intimacy-averse" partners in marriage were having affairs externally as well. MY ODDS OF WINNING THE LOTTERY AND BEING STRUCK BY LIGHTNING ON THE SAME DAY ARE GREATER THAN DISCOVERING SHE IS HAVING AN AFFAIRSo, it's good to be cautious about what one thinks about their partners' intentions or habits. A lot of people get surprised. I KNOW HER VERY WELL.In terms of traction and leverage, it sounds like what you have at this stage is effectively the same deal that most people coming into this situation have - no better and no worse. PRETTY MUCH SO. Namely, an ongoing discussion of sexual dissatisfaction, with hints of maybe dealing with it at some future point that isn't today, and a partner who is treating it as such. This is where it's at. I've had two resets in the last 12 days. Victory? No. But that we're talking about this, frequently, and in more depth than ever, while actually having sex this month at a rate 8X the annual shag rate (ASR) indicates progress. She spoke to a clergy about her withholding sex from me and the shame she feels....something that is not easy to do. I don't know yet if it's lasting, or a more robust reset, but I've got to go forward with the mindset of being a foot in both worlds: this may not be permanent/this may be improving. How do you ever declare this 'solved?' In my mind, having sex three times per month, would be less than ideal, but at the same time a HUGE leap forward, one that I could accept. Knowing we don't get everything we want in life and in marriage I have to make terms with what is a minimum acceptable level and get her to agree to that. And then, if we only have sex 5 times over two months do I do another sit-down? I really do hate reducing it to such a "scoreboard" level but realize something has to be communicated to her or else there is no accountability. I'm not sure what "a victim" means, specifically, the way you are using it. Do you know what that means in any practical sense? VICTIM IS SILENTLY PARTICIPATING IN THAT WHICH IS KILLING YOU SLOWLY> I'm curious... It's been a month since this post. Has the improvement you mentioned lasted?
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Post by blunder8 on Jan 1, 2023 18:53:18 GMT -5
Thanks for asking. The short answer is yes, things for me personally and our relationship continue to improve.
The frequency of sex is, well, frequent. We are talking about this every day and she has mentioned several times that she doesn't want to go back to how things were. Even though I have told her many times how hurtful her refusals are to me, for some reason this time it resonated with her that the anguish is real. She seems very remorseful.
I can't explain it. I really can't. I came to this forum two months ago not looking for a solution but for support and strategies for coping with this plague. At my lowest point she recognized that a future with a despondent husband wasn't what she wanted. I can hardly write these words, because the person that hurt me the most has redeemed herself, both in attitude and in the bedroom.
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Post by greatcoastal on Jan 1, 2023 20:20:47 GMT -5
Thanks for asking. The short answer is yes, things for me personally and our relationship continue to improve. The frequency of sex is, well, frequent. We are talking about this every day and she has mentioned several times that she doesn't want to go back to how things were. Even though I have told her many times how hurtful her refusals are to me, for some reason this time it resonated with her that the anguish is real. She seems very remorseful. I can't explain it. I really can't. I came to this forum two months ago not looking for a solution but for support and strategies for coping with this plague. At my lowest point she recognized that a future with a despondent husband wasn't what she wanted. I can hardly write these words, because the person that hurt me the most has redeemed herself, both in attitude and in the bedroom. WOW! WOW! That's uplifting news! Well I had to dust this one off and pull it off the shelf! I think you are really going to like this video! You can decide if it will be helpful for your wife. (here's hoping!!!) BRAVO to your wife for being strong,and caring enough to take a risk again and have it pay off!
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Post by blunder8 on Jan 1, 2023 20:23:33 GMT -5
Texted the link to my wife. She replied by asking "Do you feel better for sending this to me?" I replied,"I'd feel better if I felt physically desired by you instead of feeling compelled to send such an article"Dang. Sorry to hear that yours rejected the message. I sent it to my wife and it scored a direct hit. I attribute it to a little luck and some good timing. I took her rejection and gave it right back to her in the form of sleeping in another room, only giving a cursory greeting in the morning and evening, and generally acting uninterested in any interaction with her. Within about three weeks it was getting to her and me sending the article started the talking/learning/healing process. We seem to be on our way to a new and improved relationship. I'm not saying I have any answers. I don't. Meet her rejection and stone cold indifference with the same. Meanwhile work on making a better version of you in every way: mentally, physically, confidence. She will notice. When another article comes along that speaks to your sexless marriage in a way that you validate, send it to her. Ask her to read it. Follow up and ask if she read it. Ask if it is applicable to your relationship. If she won't engage double down on your emotionless "I don't notice you" efforts.
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Post by blunder8 on Jan 1, 2023 20:58:03 GMT -5
Thanks for asking. The short answer is yes, things for me personally and our relationship continue to improve. The frequency of sex is, well, frequent. We are talking about this every day and she has mentioned several times that she doesn't want to go back to how things were. Even though I have told her many times how hurtful her refusals are to me, for some reason this time it resonated with her that the anguish is real. She seems very remorseful. I can't explain it. I really can't. I came to this forum two months ago not looking for a solution but for support and strategies for coping with this plague. At my lowest point she recognized that a future with a despondent husband wasn't what she wanted. I can hardly write these words, because the person that hurt me the most has redeemed herself, both in attitude and in the bedroom. WOW! WOW! That's uplifting news! Well I had to dust this one off and pull it off the shelf! I think you are really going to like this video! You can decide if it will be helpful for your wife. (here's hoping!!!) BRAVO to your wife for being strong,and caring enough to take a risk again and have it pay off! Thanks. Watched the video and indeed enjoyed it. I only wished I had seen and shared this with her years ago. I don't know yet if this is an elaborate reset, but I feel in my heart that she has authentically changed. I know this because she is reading other articles and blogs on this topic and bringing them up in conversation with me! Imagine that. This video captured the essence for me....that rejection of me in bed is rejection of me as a partner. And it hurts like hell. The opposite is now true. We are having sex, enjoying it, and growing again in our bond. I feel loved and accepted, and I want to do more to strengthen the relationship. I'm going to mention a couple of points from this video to her and ask her if she wants me to share the link. So much of the content of the video is about the realization that she has already come to, so I'm not sure if it will resonate completely. It is fun to be flirty and dirty again in conversation and for it to be appreciated. Thanks again for the well wishes. I recognize some on this forum may think this story isn't true. I come on this forum at a very low point and seeking validation of being in the same boat.....and a few weeks later my marriage has completely turned around. It's an incredible tale. I wouldn't believe it if it didn't happen to me. Some day I will be able to distill the "lessons' a little more clearly and offer better advice than I can do at the moment.
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Post by blujay on Jan 2, 2023 18:35:41 GMT -5
I see this is a thread from November and I haven't read beyond the first page, but I wouldn't want my partner to have sex with me because he has to. The problem is he doesn't want to, and yes, that he doesn't want to make any effort to get to a point where he would also enjoy some level of intimacy. I know the article was about women, but I think it's a stereotype that only women are x and men are y. blunder8, I thought you said you have been cheating on your wife. Do you think she found out/was suspicious and was afraide she'll lose her marriage if she doesn't have sex with you?
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Post by northstarmom on Jan 2, 2023 18:45:04 GMT -5
blujay: "The problem is he doesn't want to, and yes, that he doesn't want to make any effort to get to a point where he would also enjoy some level of intimacy." His virtually nonexistent low t probably has made him so depressed that he lacks the energy to get treatment, and he probably doesn't even remember what it was like to have a sex drive and a generally normal energy level. My post SM lover got on T when his t level dipped. He took T even though he didn't have a sexual partner. He said he didn't feel like himself -- had no ambition, energy or sex drive. As he put it, "I didn't feel like a man." And he had low T, not no T. I'm wondering if you made appointments for your husband to get T-therapy, help with his probable depression, if he'd go if you took him. He really does seem to have a major medical problem that is affecting the entire quality of his and your life, not just your sex life. Low t has been linked to the following: "increased body fat decreased strength/mass of muscles fragile bones decreased body hair swelling/tenderness in the breast tissue hot flashes increased fatigue effects on cholesterol metabolism" www.healthline.com/health/side-effects-of-low-testosterone#emotional-changes
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Post by blunder8 on Jan 2, 2023 19:30:30 GMT -5
"blunder8, I thought you said you have been cheating on your wife. Do you think she found out/was suspicious and was afraide she'll lose her marriage if she doesn't have sex with you?"
No. Didn't happen. I was ready to go outsourcing. I admit I was at a ready-set-go mindset a few weeks ago. I even briefly did a profile on AFF. About the same time that I realized what a pointless endeavor it was, the unexpected happened and Mrs. blunder8 had a change of heart. So did I.
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Post by blujay on Jan 2, 2023 22:15:58 GMT -5
blujay: "The problem is he doesn't want to, and yes, that he doesn't want to make any effort to get to a point where he would also enjoy some level of intimacy." His virtually nonexistent low t probably has made him so depressed that he lacks the energy to get treatment, and he probably doesn't even remember what it was like to have a sex drive and a generally normal energy level. My post SM lover got on T when his t level dipped. He took T even though he didn't have a sexual partner. He said he didn't feel like himself -- had no ambition, energy or sex drive. As he put it, "I didn't feel like a man." And he had low T, not no T. I'm wondering if you made appointments for your husband to get T-therapy, help with his probable depression, if he'd go if you took him. He really does seem to have a major medical problem that is affecting the entire quality of his and your life, not just your sex life. Low t has been linked to the following: "increased body fat decreased strength/mass of muscles fragile bones decreased body hair swelling/tenderness in the breast tissue hot flashes increased fatigue effects on cholesterol metabolism" www.healthline.com/health/side-effects-of-low-testosterone#emotional-changesThank you, yes he should talk to his doctor again, and he does seem quite flat emotionally, possibly depressed.. I'm not sure though how depressed he is. I'm sure he doesn't not have sex just out of some resentment. I asked him to talk to his doctor about testosterone therapy and he said he did but the doctor said taking T is not good for his heart. I found some studies that backed that up. However, a couple of months ago, I asked him to ask the doctor for semaglutide and he has lost 30lb already! It takes away all of the cravings! Semaglutide is a miracle drug right now. I am hoping that as he gets better/in better shape, we can re-discuss T therapy and his mood will be better too. He exercises now too. I don't think I'll ever divorce him and will probably not cheat on him either. I don't think it's his fault that he's like this, although it's hard for me. I imagine it's not much fun for him either.
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onlyhuman
Junior Member

Learning to be all right with what I want.
Posts: 29
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Post by onlyhuman on Jan 2, 2023 22:17:00 GMT -5
Texted the link to my wife. She replied by asking "Do you feel better for sending this to me?" I replied,"I'd feel better if I felt physically desired by you instead of feeling compelled to send such an article" So did a discussion ensue? No, but some action did to close 2022. Once Friday night and again on Saturday morning. And more than just starfish sex!
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