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Post by surfergirl on Oct 17, 2018 7:09:25 GMT -5
@elle Not meant to be! Just saying it in jest, comparing the outsourcing married men to single men. Lots better selection in the married section! It's a no-go for me (to date a married man now that I'm single). I just meant it as a "ha ha".  |
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Post by greatcoastal on Oct 17, 2018 8:10:58 GMT -5
@elle Not meant to be! Just saying it in jest, comparing the outsourcing married men to single men. Lots better selection in the married section! It's a no-go for me (to date a married man now that I'm single). I just meant it as a "ha ha".  Same here! No dating married woman.I would consider someone mostly finished with their divorce, since I was in those shoes before. I have all of you to thank for that information. The stories of the LTR's that ended because someone would not leave their marriage, makes my skin crawl! |
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Post by elkclan2 on Oct 17, 2018 9:54:33 GMT -5
@elle Not meant to be! Just saying it in jest, comparing the outsourcing married men to single men. Lots better selection in the married section! It's a no-go for me (to date a married man now that I'm single). I just meant it as a "ha ha". Totally agree with this - in a way. That's what it felt like for me sometimes. But really no - I found a great guy. Just takes longer!!! |
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Post by javba on Oct 17, 2018 11:09:37 GMT -5
pheonix25 I found a lot of good matches on Ashley Madison. The ratio is in our favor (real women vs. men). You will have your pick. I almost regret getting divorced. Much better selection on Ashley Madison. The guys on regular sites are generally: scumbags, men who will never commit, or men who were discarded for a REASON. It's a curious dichotomy in my mind as guys have a shorter life span, in older years finding someone worth your while may be harder for women, than men? However if it's a free website there will be free-loaders so there's your scumbag ratio. On AM for guys the experiences are less than favorable (and that's an optimistic statement). Though I had asked "NOT TO BE CONTACTED" under 40 or Out of Area, there's hoards of  FREE LOADER women most of them OUT OF AREA, even OUT OF COUNTRY sending pic and messages. I do not know about more "data driven - or serious minded sites" such as Match? Perhaps if you're SOMEWHERE in your life where you VALUE yourself you'd put your money on finding someone valuable? |
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Post by mirrororchid on Jan 25, 2022 6:52:12 GMT -5
Side note: I am also meeting widows. That's a whole new experience. Too much curiosity not to necropost. Wassup with the widows? |
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Post by Apocrypha on Jan 25, 2022 11:10:09 GMT -5
That makes a lot more sense. Thanks for clarifying that for me! I'll strongly consider that,and find the proper place to post it. lately I keep getting messages, and my profile viewed,from women 20 years younger than me, while I am messaging and viewing profiles of woman, who are my age, a few years older or at the most 10 yrs younger. And I recieve little response. You would not believe the conversations I am having. The desire for me (online only, my recent pics and honest answers) is so strong, it is way outside my comfort zone. let me put it this way, "not what I would aim for if meeting people face to face". Either they are looking for a "sugar daddy", an honest kind man , who wants a LTR* or I have been selling myself short for all these years. ( that can happen men/woman when you've been locked in to a SM for 25 yrs) Side note: I am also meeting widows. That's a whole new experience. When you sign on to many dating sites, the algorithm gives you a boost for a couple weeks, putting you in front of a lot of people. It will die off after that. Most sex-forward dating sites with limited free-chat introductions are stuffed with chatbot fake profiles, who check you out and are overly complimentary and interested, but also non-specific in their comments. They are intended to get men to sign on to paid subscriptions to follow up on the supposed introductions. With some practice, you can sniff them out. Others are also third party chatbots who use the site to make introductions, and then try to lure you into private chat and then into some other paid service to talk with them directly. They often have a boilerplate statement about how it is safer for women to chat through that site. Most younger women (20's/30's) who are seeking out older men decades their senior, and I mean ALMOST ALL OF THEM who reach out from the sites, are looking for a "Sugar Daddy" situation in which they are paid in a stipend or gifts/dinner. Younger women are in high demand and older guys who want to be with them are readily available. They don't need to reach out directly - they will be inundated with offers - dozens to hundreds each week. Look for flag words such as "generous" or "fwb 'arrangement'" where the benefit is later revealed to be monetary. |
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Post by greatcoastal on Jan 25, 2022 17:53:17 GMT -5
Side note: I am also meeting widows. That's a whole new experience. Too much curiosity not to necropost. Wassup with the widows? Honestly? That was 3 1/2 yrs. ago. I remember very little about it. Not much ever happened from it. However, I would strongly consider it in the future, and could see a glorious relationship evolve from it! For those of us who are in "opposite land" it feels like we lost a spouse. Death to a marriage. |
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Post by greatcoastal on Jan 25, 2022 17:58:48 GMT -5
That makes a lot more sense. Thanks for clarifying that for me! I'll strongly consider that,and find the proper place to post it. lately I keep getting messages, and my profile viewed,from women 20 years younger than me, while I am messaging and viewing profiles of woman, who are my age, a few years older or at the most 10 yrs younger. And I recieve little response. You would not believe the conversations I am having. The desire for me (online only, my recent pics and honest answers) is so strong, it is way outside my comfort zone. let me put it this way, "not what I would aim for if meeting people face to face". Either they are looking for a "sugar daddy", an honest kind man , who wants a LTR* or I have been selling myself short for all these years. ( that can happen men/woman when you've been locked in to a SM for 25 yrs) Side note: I am also meeting widows. That's a whole new experience. When you sign on to many dating sites, the algorithm gives you a boost for a couple weeks, putting you in front of a lot of people. It will die off after that. Most sex-forward dating sites with limited free-chat introductions are stuffed with chatbot fake profiles, who check you out and are overly complimentary and interested, but also non-specific in their comments. They are intended to get men to sign on to paid subscriptions to follow up on the supposed introductions. With some practice, you can sniff them out. Others are also third party chatbots who use the site to make introductions, and then try to lure you into private chat and then into some other paid service to talk with them directly. They often have a boilerplate statement about how it is safer for women to chat through that site. Most younger women (20's/30's) who are seeking out older men decades their senior, and I mean ALMOST ALL OF THEM who reach out from the sites, are looking for a "Sugar Daddy" situation in which they are paid in a stipend or gifts/dinner. Younger women are in high demand and older guys who want to be with them are readily available. They don't need to reach out directly - they will be inundated with offers - dozens to hundreds each week. Look for flag words such as "generous" or "fwb 'arrangement'" where the benefit is later revealed to be monetary. When and if I go back to "the dating scene" I want to stay away from on-line dating altogether. Especially being a man,and at my age, the odds are heavily stacked against me. I'd rather have friends introduce me to people " set me up" ,or meet people through volunteering again. |
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Post by northstarmom on Jan 25, 2022 22:26:14 GMT -5
greatcoastal: "When and if I go back to "the dating scene" I want to stay away from on-line dating altogether. Especially being a man,and at my age, the odds are heavily stacked against me. I'd rather have friends introduce me to people " set me up" ,or meet people through volunteering again."
?? I can understand why you'd prefer meeting women through friends or volunteering. I agree that narrows the odds of finding someone compatible. However, the older men get, the more the male: female ratio is in their favor. There are at least 2 reasons for this. Women usually have partners who are older than they are. Men die at an earlier age than do women. Consequently, for men who aren't in their twenties or perhaps in their 30s, on-line dating is easier for men than for women.
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Post by Apocrypha on Jan 26, 2022 11:46:54 GMT -5
When you sign on to many dating sites, the algorithm gives you a boost for a couple weeks, putting you in front of a lot of people. It will die off after that. Most sex-forward dating sites with limited free-chat introductions are stuffed with chatbot fake profiles, who check you out and are overly complimentary and interested, but also non-specific in their comments. They are intended to get men to sign on to paid subscriptions to follow up on the supposed introductions. With some practice, you can sniff them out. Others are also third party chatbots who use the site to make introductions, and then try to lure you into private chat and then into some other paid service to talk with them directly. They often have a boilerplate statement about how it is safer for women to chat through that site. Most younger women (20's/30's) who are seeking out older men decades their senior, and I mean ALMOST ALL OF THEM who reach out from the sites, are looking for a "Sugar Daddy" situation in which they are paid in a stipend or gifts/dinner. Younger women are in high demand and older guys who want to be with them are readily available. They don't need to reach out directly - they will be inundated with offers - dozens to hundreds each week. Look for flag words such as "generous" or "fwb 'arrangement'" where the benefit is later revealed to be monetary. When and if I go back to "the dating scene" I want to stay away from on-line dating altogether. Especially being a man,and at my age, the odds are heavily stacked against me. I'd rather have friends introduce me to people " set me up" ,or meet people through volunteering again. It's a romantic sentiment - and maybe your situation is different from mine in a metropolitan city in the 45-55 age range where dating is a martial exercise and moves fast - but not generally practical anymore. Unless you know a woman is in the dating market AND specifically looking for a partner in the context of your meeting, you risk coming off as creepy or inappropriate. It might work if you have a large and active friend network (especially for a man) with friends who know a large pool of single women, but that's not likely the case for most people. The norm these days is to do low intensity vetting through an app and move from there. |
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FREE LOADER women most of them OUT OF AREA, even OUT OF COUNTRY sending pic and messages. 
